“Is Simplicity Best…”

“…Or Simply The Easiest?”

—DEPECHE MODE

((From The Song “JUDAS“ (1993)))

“JUDAS“ Is Just A Personal Favorite Jam From DEPECHE MODE That Just Happened To Pop-On During My Morning Walk! It’s Not The Best Song On The Album, “SONGS OF FAITH AND DEVOTION“, But There Truly Isn’t A Bad Song On The Entire Album. Period. 😀

“True. I Was Their Number-One Son, And They Treated Me Like Number-Two…”

“…But, It‘s Human–Nature To Fear The Unusual.  Perhaps, When I Held My Tiffany Baby–Rattle With A Shiny Flipper Instead Of Five Chubby–Digits… …They Freaked.  But, I Forgive Them.”

—OSWALD COBBLEPOT/”THE PENGUIN“

((Danny DeVito, “BATMAN RETURNS” (1992)))

😀

BRADLEY -Vs- “DARK CITY”: A Rematch 15 Years In The Making!

Opening Night.

1998.

I Was There.

I’ll Never Forget That Night, Honestly.

My Friends And I Had Decided Long Before It Was Released We Would Be Seeing This One On Said Opening Night.

Back In The 1980s And 1990s, That’s What Everyone Did On A Friday Night. You’d Meet-Up With Your Friends And You’d Head To The Local Movie Theater.

It Was Almost Like A Ritual. We Simply HAD HAD HAD To Go See Something.

Living In A Small Midwestern Town, It’s What We Had To Do.

It Was Our Best Option For Having A Good Time. It Was Either That, Or Go Walk Around The Mall.

I Know, Right, We Were Lame.

ANYWAY…

…We All Loaded-Up And Drove A Few Towns Over To The Much Larger Theater.

It’s About A 25-Minute Drive.

(((well we probably made it in less than 20-minutes, but it's SUPPOSED to take longer)))

Upon Entering The Theater, I Was Immediately Horrified To Find It Totally Packed.

The Only Seats Left Weren’t Ideal, To Say The Least.

We Took Said Seats, Anyway.

We Weren’t About To Miss This Flick.

Period.

Sadly, The Theater Was BLAZING-ASS-HOT!

Not Hot As In “Hip & Cool”…

…No…

…I Mean It Was F-in’ HOT HOT HOT Like Hell’ishly HOT!

Like 714-Degrees HOT!

It Was February, And Therefore Cold Outside.

So, The Theater People Had The Heat Cranked Allllll The Way Up.

That’s How It Felt, Anyway.

Couple That With A Totally Packed House, And Yeah.

HOT HOT HOT!!!

The People Sitting In Front Of My Friends And I Never Stopped Gabbing. Someone’s Pocket-Pager Went Off Like 10-Times. I Couldn’t Follow The Plot Very Well Because Of The Distractions And Became Very Confused As To What The Hell Was Really Going On.

It Was All Too Much.

Add In The Fact That “DARK CITY” Is A Dark, Slower-Paced Thriller And It Becomes Easier To Understand Why I Left The Theater Afterward Vowing To NEVER Watch This Flick Ever Ever EVER AGAIN!

And I Didn’t.

For 15 Years, My Vow Stood Strong And Unwavering.

That Is, Until Very Recently.

Seeing “DARK CITY” On Opening Night Was THE WORST THEATER EXPERIENCE OF MY LIFE.

Period.

It Had Totally Tainted My View Of The Movie.

You See, I Took-Out My Frustrations Of The Night On The Film. I Shouldn’t Have, But I Did.

My Bad.

Upon Watching It Again, Finally, After 15 Years, I Finally Realized I Had Made A Horrid Mistake.

“DARK CITY” Really Is A Quality Flick, My Peeps.

Watching It In The Comfort Of My Own Home, Without Distractions, I Was Able To Finally Appreciate It For What It Is.

A Very Good SCI-FI THRILLER.

It’s Well Acted.

(((starring RUFUS SEWELL, KIEFER SUTHERLAND, JENNIFER CONNELLY, and WILLIAM HURT)))

It’s Well Directed.

(((craftily done by ALEX PROYAS whom also directed another favorite of mine "THE CROW")))

The Sets And Special F/X Are Very Cool.

The Plot Can Be A Touch Confusing At Times, But You’ll Eventually Get It In The End.

All In All, I Was Saddened It Had Taken Me So Long To Finally Give It Another Chance.

BUT, In The End, I’m Super Glad I Did.

“DARK CITY” Deserved Better Than What It Got.

It Deserved Better Than What I Gave It.

SO, Here I Am, Trying To Rectify The Problem.

😀

If You’ve Seen This One, GREAT.

If You’ve Not, Well, DO SO.

Some People Can’t Get Enough Of “DARK CITY“…

…Some People Can’t F-in’ Stand It.

WHICH ONE ARE YOU?!??!?

My Curiosity Abounds.

😉     😀     😉

I’ve Been Putting Pen-To-Paper So Much…

…I’ve Nearly Lost Myself Here.

I Don’t Mean To Neglect Y’all, My Peeps, But I’ve Been Trying To Take Things In A Whole New Direction.

New For Me.

New For You.

New For Us.

My Fire…

…My Drive…

…My Want…

…My Need…

…My Desire…

…They’re All Returning.

Returning Harder And Faster Than I’d Honestly Known Was Even Possible.

I Was Burning-Out.

The Fire Had Seriously Dimmed.

It Felt Choked.

Smothered.

Almost Strangled Out Of Existence.

And Then It Happened.

The Spark Came Into My Life, And It’s Not Letting Me Go…

…I’m Not Letting It Go.

The Fire Is Burning Hotter And Brighter Than It Has In Forever.

Things Are Changing.

Inside And Out, They’re Are Changing.

And I’m Loving It.

I’m Loving Every Bit Of It.

Am I Setting Myself Up For Failure?

Maybe.

I Don’t Really Care.

No Risk, No Reward.

Right???

RIGHT!!!

Soon, You’re All Going To Start Noticing The Transitions I’m Working-Out.

You’re Going To Hear Me Talk A Lot About The “Clean Slate“ And How It Can Literally Mean Everything.

I Wanted Nothing More Than A “Clean Slate“…

…A “Fresh Start“…

…A “New Beginning“…

…However You Wanna Put It.

Now, I’m Getting That Chance.

I’m Making That Chance.

I’m Taking That Chance.

It’s Mine.

All I Have To Do Is Own It.

And, Own It, I Shall.

🙂       😉       😀

And Now, For Your Listening Pleasure, The Song That Totally Says Everything I Need It To Say Right This Moment…

“INSIGHT“

by DEPECHE MODE

…From Their 1997 Album “ULTRA” !!!

Enjoy It, My Peeps.

You Already Know I Do…

…I Am…

…I Will.

Always And Forever, I Will.

I’ve Given You An Insight Into MY Life…

…I Just Hope To Reward Your Loving Patience.

Later On, My Peeps.

We’ll Be Talking More VERY Soon!!!

“Feeling Like A Freak On A Leash…”

“…((You Wanna See The Light))…

…Feeling Like I Have No Release…

…((So Do I))…

…How Many Times Have I Felt Diseased?…

…((You Wanna See The Light))…

…Nothing In My Life Is Free…

…Is Free…”

…

“…Sometimes I Cannot Take This Place…

…Sometimes It’s My Life I Can‘t Taste…

…Sometimes I Cannot Feel My Face…

…You‘ll Never See Me Fall From Grace…”

…

“…Something Takes A Part Of Me…

…You And I Were Meant To Be…

…A Cheap Fu*k For Me To Lay…

…Something Takes A Part Of Me. …”

… … …

“FREAK ON A LEASH” Is By The Nu Metal Band KORN And Was Released In 1998 !!!

“FREAK ON A LEASH” Is Originally Off Of The 1998 Studio Album “FOLLOW THE LEADER” By KORN !!!

… … …

<<<{*}>>>

\\//

\/

What Can I Tell You About This Song…

“FREAK ON A LEASH“

by KORN

???

Hmm.

Well.

Hmm.

I Suppose I Can’t Really Say To Much.

This Is An Instance Where It’s Best If I Keep My Mouth Shut.

BUT…

“FREAK ON A LEASH“

…Is A Very Awesome…

…Very Special Song In My World.

It Holds So Much Of A Deeper Meaning.

And, Honestly, I’d Love To Say A Whole Lot Right Now.

But, I’m Holding Back Because I Don’t Think It Would Be Taken Tooooo Well.

I’ve Been A Huge Fan Of This Song Since I First Saw The Music Video In 1999, While I Was In The Navy.

Upon Hearing It Back Then, I Was An Instant Fan.

Period.

Sooo…

…Today I’m Sharing It With Y’all.

I Know, I Know…

…The Band KORN Isn’t Everyone’s Cup-O-Tea.

Then Again, A Lot Of The Music I Write About Isn’t For Everyone.

There Are Likely More People Whom Hate This Song Than I Really Realize.

But, For Now, I Don’t Care.

I Had To Get This Song Out Of My Head, As I’ve Been Listening To It A LOT A LOT Over The Past Two-Weeks.

And You Know Me…

…I Get Things Out Of My Head By Way Of My Bloggin’ing.

So…

…Here I Am…

…Bloggin’ing ’bout It.

I Sure Hope This Works, To Be Honest.

Perhaps It Will.

Perhaps It Won’t.

But, I’m Still Trying.

That’s All One Can Really Do, Right?!

Try Try TRY AGAIN!!!

We Shall See, My Peeps.

We Shall See, Indeed.

😀

PLEASE Have A Damned Decent Day.

And, I Sure Hope Y’all Have A Wonderful Weekend!!!

L8r L8r, My Tater-Tots!!!

😉

😀       😀

When Remembering Turns To Dwelling Turns To Suffering…

…You Know You‘re Fu*ked.

—At This Moment, I‘m Writing Just To Watch Myself Write.

I‘ve Slept Less Than 35–Hours In The Past 10–Nights COMBINED.

I‘m Irritable.

I‘m Sullen And Moody.

I‘ve Lost 15–LBS In That 10–Day Span.

I Don‘t Understand Why I Let Myself Get This Depressed.

I Know I Do It To Myself.

It‘s My Own Fault.

But, I‘M Not My Own Fault.

I Know That.

I Never Have Been.

I Was Created And Shaped By Events In My Life That Have Seriously Fu*ked-Me–Up.

Why Can‘t I Shake This?

Why Does The Past Still Cling To Me Like The Stench Of Death?

It Haunts My Day–To–Day Existence.

I Know Why.

BECAUSE I LET IT.

Period.

MY BAD.

It‘s These Memories.

I Can‘t Handle Them As Well As I‘d Like To.

As Well As I SHOULD.

It‘s Honestly Maddening.

It‘s Hard.

It‘s So Very VERY Hard.

I Go From Day To Day Seeing No Benefit From It All.

I‘ve…

…Sheesh…

…I‘ve Become My Own Worst Enemy.

Just As I Was Always TOLD I Would Be.

Just As I Always KNEW I Would Be.

It Happens To Us All At Some Point, Sure.

It’s Life.

It‘s LIVING Life.

My Moments Of Weakness And Horror Come To Me Like Flashes.

As Images.

Images A Person Should Never See.

No One.

The Thoughts Linger.

The Ill–Feelings They Cause Linger Longer.

Am I Having An Identity Crisis?

Whatever It Is, It‘s Hanging On Way Way WAY Tooo Long.

Talking To People Is Becoming More And MORE Difficult.

There Are A Couple Key People I‘d Love To Talk To.

They Just Don‘t Want To Talk To Me.

Sometimes, I Break Down And Simply MUST Talk To Someone.

Those Are The Moments When I‘m Feeling My Worst.

When I Know Something‘s Wrong Inside, And I Need To Make An Outside Connection Before I Snap.

I Feel The Worst, Though, When I Do Have To Ask For Help.

But, At The Point I Start Talking, I‘m Already Scraping The Bottom Of The Barrel For The Oxygen I Need To Survive.

I Am.

It Gets Hard To Breathe.

I Start Feeling Sorry For Myself.

I Lose Personal Control.

I Become Someone Else.

Someone I Truly Am NOT.

A Whining…

…Crying…

…Sniveling…

…Used–To–Be.

I Know I’m Only 30‘ish‘ish.

Some Attempt To Push Upon Me That I‘m Still Far Too Young To Deal With Shit As I Do.

But, Everyone‘s Different…

…Correct???

Everyone‘s Got Their Own Stopping And Starting Point.

Their Own Breaking Point.

I Guess Mine Was Just A Bit Earlier In Life Than Some Others.

I Know I Don‘t Have It That Bad.

It‘s Not Like Someone Close To Me Has Died, Or Is Dying.

It‘s Simply The Past.

A Past I‘ve Yet To Beat.

A Past I‘ve Yet To Escape From.

A Past I‘ve Yet To Come To Terms With.

A Past I‘ve Yet To Let Go Of And Move On From.

And It‘s Destroying My Present.

I Guess Some Of This Is Normal, Right?

Thinking Of It All Has Just Brought Me Down So Much.

I Just Feel Very Alone, At Times.

But, I Do Understand That Life Could Be Much Worse.

Sadly…

…My Once Remarked–Upon Eyes Are Heavy, Dark, And Tired.

My Hopeful Outlook Has Turned Bleak.

Yet, Despite It All, I Survive.

MAYBE It All Has Made Me Stronger In Some Ways?

But, At What Personal Cost?

With Age And Experience Has Also Come Fear…

…Hate…

…Despair.

Where I Once Felt Love, I Now Feel Bitterness.

Where I Once Felt Alive, I Now Feel Drained.

Where I Once Cared About Life, I Now Resent It.

So Sad, Yet, So True.

It Just Pisses Me Off To No Extent.

When Wonderful Memories Become Jaded With Time.

I Swear, It Literally Makes Me Sick.

What I Wouldn‘t Give For A Moment‘s Peace.

A Clear Mind.

A Quiet Mind.

I Know I Have Some Amazing Moments Stored In My Brain–Case.

I‘ve Just Become To Bitter To See Them.

*** ***

PLEASE, My Peeps…

…Don‘t Be Alarmed By Anything I‘ve Said.

It‘s Just A Downer Moment For Me, And I‘m Allowing You To Experience It With Me.

I Guess I Just Wanted To Vent A Bit, As I Often Do When I Get Like This.

As I‘ve Said To Y‘all Before…

…Sometimes, It‘s Not Just The BEST Therapy…

…It‘s The ONLY Therapy.

Right???

RIGHT!!!—

Engaged Twice… …But Still Single.

That’s Right, My Peeps.

Yours Truly Has Been Ready To Tie-The-Knot…

…Not ONCE…

…But TWICE.

At Least, I’ve Asked Two Different People To Marry Me.

The First Was An Impossibility.

She Knew It.

I Knew It.

But, It Happened Nevertheless.

Is She Better-Off Without Me?

Oh, Most Definitely.

She Was Younger.

She Was Hotter.

She Was A Jock.

Yet, She Was So Tender AND Loving.

She Lit-Up A Room Upon Entering.

She Made Everyone Smile.

She Made My Friends Pat Me On The Back Saying…

“Well Done, Sir. Well Done, Indeed.“

As It Turned-Out, However, I Was NOT What She Was Looking For.

The Engagement…

…Which Was Made Through A Phone-Call…

…Lasted Almost Exactly TWO (2) Months.

Not A Lot Of Time, I Grant That.

But Those Were Two Very Special Months.

For The First Time In My Life, I Sincerely Felt As Though I Belonged.

I Had The Gal Of My Dreams, And Nothing Was Going To Take That Away From Me.

Nothing Except Her, Of Course.

She Broke-Off The Engagement.

That Part Stung A Bit, But I Understood.

Just THREE (3) Days Later, However, She Broke-Off The Entire Relationship.

That Part Stung More Than A Bit.

It Was The Only Time In My Life I Could Easily Say I Felt Something For A Member Of The Fairer-Sex.

After She And I Ended Our Union, I Totally Gave-Up On Trying To Date Women.

I Could Never Do Better Than Her, That’s Fo SHO.

When You’ve Had The Best, Why Deal With The Rest?

Of Course, While She And I Were On-The-Rocks, I Was Also Seeing A Fellow Shipmate On The Side.

He Was Slightly My Elder.

He Was Slightly Taller.

He Was Slightly More Attractive.

He Was Priceless, Honestly.

When I Told Him My Girl Had Finally Become Fed-Up With The Whole “Long Distance” Thing, His Response Was Muted.

“Well, Hell, It Happens.“

That Was The Most I Could Get Out Of Him In This Regard.

He Knew I Wasn’t Like The Rest.

He Knew That, While Personally Disheartening, The Break-Up Wouldn’t Do Much Harm.

He Knew What I Was.

I Didn’t.

But, He Did.

I Was Still In My “Total Denial“ Phase.

You’ve Been Through One, Before.

We All Have.

Not About The Same Thing, No…

…But About Something.

There’s Always A Part Of Ourselves We’re Not Pleased With.

Something We Deny, And Continue To Deny.

We’ll Deny It Until We’re Forced To Do Otherwise.

It Took Another TWO (2) YEARS Before I Finally Came To Grips With My Denial.

I Maintained It As Long As I Could.

I Fought A Good Fight.

In The End…

…I Lost The Battle To Myself.

Hey, It Happens.

Such Is Life.

The Second Time I Was Engaged, The Circumstances Were Much, MUCH Different.

This Was Someone I’d Dated A While.

A Long While.

BUT…

…I Knew I Was Ready.

I Knew Whom I Wanted…

…And Exactly What I Wanted.

So, I Asked.

And He Said “YES“!!!

I Was Shocked AND Amazed.

I Didn’t Expect The “YES“, Actually.

I Expected The “Well, You’re A Great Guy, BUT…” Speech.

But, That Didn’t Happen.

Instead, I Was Suddenly Engaged For The Second Time.

Except, This Time, I Was Simply Sure Sure SURE It Was Going To Work-Out.

We’d Been Together For Over 2-Years At That Point.

It Felt Like A Very Safe Bet, And I Was Ready.

I Was Ready To Take The Plunge And Simply Go For It.

It Wasn’t Long Afterward The Proverbial Rug Was Ripped From Under Me.

He Broke-Off The Engagement…

…And Then The Relationship.

I Wanted To Cry.

I Wanted To Show How Much It Hurt.

But, I Didn’t.

I Just Sucked-It-Up.

I Carried-On.

I Will Say This…

…If I Ever Need To Escape A Relationship…

…All I Really Need To Do Is Ask The Person To Marry Me.

In Fact, I’d Likely Be Single Again Before The End Of The Day.

Is It Me?

Am I The Reason They Duck-Out?

Or, Is It Something Else?

Perhaps It’s Thoughts Of The Future?

Our Future?

Could YOU Handle Marrying Someone You Already Knew Had Mental Difficulties???

That Could Turn-Out To Be The Question Of The Day.

Could YOU Handle It, My Peeps?

Could YOU See Yourself Loving Someone Like That?

Someone Who Spends Most Of His Time In A Dark, Sullen Mood?

Someone Who Always Sees The Negative BEFORE He Sees Anything Positive?

Could You?

Could You Handle It?

It’s A Valid Question, My Peeps.

It’s One Where I’m Very, VERY Curious About The Answer.

“It Is A Black-Art, And I, HARU, Am The Blackest Of The Black. Or, Rather, The Great White Black-Art…Blackest…Master.” –HARU (Chris Farley in “BEVERLY HILLS NINJA” (1997))

The Nephew Wanted To Stay Up Late, So I Decided We Should Watch A Movie.

Since It Was My Idea, It Also Became My Responsibility To Select The Flick We’d Be Kickin’-Back With.

I Wanted Something That Would Make Him Laugh.

I Also Wanted Something That Was Appropriate For Staying-Up-Late And Actually Staying Awake.

My Decision Was More Like Instinct Than A Thought-Out-Reaction.

I Immediately Said…

“Holy Shit, I Know Where That Old Copy Of Beverly Hills Ninja Is!!! SWISH!!!”

And It Was Done.

Here It Is.

(((HAHAHA!!!)))

I Know, Right.

PERFECT!!!

Uncle Brad Shoots…

…Uncle Brad Hits Paydirt!!!

Huh!!?!

Well…

…Whatever You Wanna Call It.

It Went Over Great.

And Now, He’s In Bed Sleeping Away.

And I’m Awake.

Writing This.

For You.

Because I Care, And So Should You.

😉

(((teehehehe)))

😀          😀

Sleep Sweet, My Peeps.

I’m Going To Be Trying To Very Soon, I Promise.

🙂

“Only When I Cease To Breathe Will I Be Dead, Tanley!” —HARU

😀       😛       😉       🙂

A Belated Xmas Quickie That Needs To Be Shared.

My Grandparents…

((aka Maw and Paw))

…Got Me This Book For Xmas:

“THE UNTOLD CIVIL WAR: EXPLORING THE HUMAN SIDE OF WAR“

by JAMES ROBERTSON

🙂       🙂

Honestly, I Was Left Kinda Speechless.

It’s An Expensive Ought-Damned Book.

But, I Did Want It.

She (Maw) Was Worried I’d Be Disappointed With It.

But, I Love It AND Her.

You See, My Peeps, She Took Me To See The Flick…

“GETTYSBURG“

…Back During The Winter Of 1993.

Neither She, Nor I, Knew What We Were Getting Into With It.

When The 2-Hour Point Of The Flick Came And Went, She Kept Looking To Me Hoping It Was Going To Be Over Soon.

Little Did We Know We Weren’t Even Half-Way Through The Flick.

The Lights Came-Up, And She Assumed It Was Time To Head Home.

However, The Lights Only Came-Up To Signal The Intermission.

After The Intermission…

…Oh Yeah…

…Another 2+Hours Of The Flick Remained.

But, She Sat Through It.

She Sat Through All 4+Hours And Didn’t Complain About It One Bit.

Maw Knows I Love History.

She Knows I Love Documentaries.

She Knows I Love Historically Relevant Films.

She Knows I Love REAL Books.

She Knows One Of My Favorite Subjects Is The American Civil War.

So, Maw And Paw Totally Got Me The Royal Hook-Up With This Book.

I’m Already Loving It.

And, Honestly, I Likely Always Will Love It.

‘Tis An AWESOME Gift, Fo SHO, My Peeps.

And Sooooo…

…I Really Just Wanted To Say Thank You, Again, To Maw And Paw.

I Totally Appreciate How Well They Know Me…

…My Tastes…

…And Where My Personal Joy Lies In Wait.

THANK YOU!!!

😀       😀