That’s Right, My Peeps.
Yours Truly Has Been Ready To Tie-The-Knot…
…Not ONCE…
…But TWICE.
At Least, I’ve Asked Two Different People To Marry Me.
The First Was An Impossibility.
She Knew It.
I Knew It.
But, It Happened Nevertheless.
Is She Better-Off Without Me?
Oh, Most Definitely.
She Was Younger.
She Was Hotter.
She Was A Jock.
Yet, She Was So Tender AND Loving.
She Lit-Up A Room Upon Entering.
She Made Everyone Smile.
She Made My Friends Pat Me On The Back Saying…
“Well Done, Sir. Well Done, Indeed.“
As It Turned-Out, However, I Was NOT What She Was Looking For.
The Engagement…
…Which Was Made Through A Phone-Call…
…Lasted Almost Exactly TWO (2) Months.
Not A Lot Of Time, I Grant That.
But Those Were Two Very Special Months.
For The First Time In My Life, I Sincerely Felt As Though I Belonged.
I Had The Gal Of My Dreams, And Nothing Was Going To Take That Away From Me.
Nothing Except Her, Of Course.
She Broke-Off The Engagement.
That Part Stung A Bit, But I Understood.
Just THREE (3) Days Later, However, She Broke-Off The Entire Relationship.
That Part Stung More Than A Bit.
It Was The Only Time In My Life I Could Easily Say I Felt Something For A Member Of The Fairer-Sex.
After She And I Ended Our Union, I Totally Gave-Up On Trying To Date Women.
I Could Never Do Better Than Her, That’s Fo SHO.
When You’ve Had The Best, Why Deal With The Rest?
Of Course, While She And I Were On-The-Rocks, I Was Also Seeing A Fellow Shipmate On The Side.
He Was Slightly My Elder.
He Was Slightly Taller.
He Was Slightly More Attractive.
He Was Priceless, Honestly.
When I Told Him My Girl Had Finally Become Fed-Up With The Whole “Long Distance” Thing, His Response Was Muted.
“Well, Hell, It Happens.“
That Was The Most I Could Get Out Of Him In This Regard.
He Knew I Wasn’t Like The Rest.
He Knew That, While Personally Disheartening, The Break-Up Wouldn’t Do Much Harm.
He Knew What I Was.
I Didn’t.
But, He Did.
I Was Still In My “Total Denial“ Phase.
You’ve Been Through One, Before.
We All Have.
Not About The Same Thing, No…
…But About Something.
There’s Always A Part Of Ourselves We’re Not Pleased With.
Something We Deny, And Continue To Deny.
We’ll Deny It Until We’re Forced To Do Otherwise.
It Took Another TWO (2) YEARS Before I Finally Came To Grips With My Denial.
I Maintained It As Long As I Could.
I Fought A Good Fight.
In The End…
…I Lost The Battle To Myself.
Hey, It Happens.
Such Is Life.
The Second Time I Was Engaged, The Circumstances Were Much, MUCH Different.
This Was Someone I’d Dated A While.
A Long While.
BUT…
…I Knew I Was Ready.
I Knew Whom I Wanted…
…And Exactly What I Wanted.
So, I Asked.
And He Said “YES“!!!
I Was Shocked AND Amazed.
I Didn’t Expect The “YES“, Actually.
I Expected The “Well, You’re A Great Guy, BUT…” Speech.
But, That Didn’t Happen.
Instead, I Was Suddenly Engaged For The Second Time.
Except, This Time, I Was Simply Sure Sure SURE It Was Going To Work-Out.
We’d Been Together For Over 2-Years At That Point.
It Felt Like A Very Safe Bet, And I Was Ready.
I Was Ready To Take The Plunge And Simply Go For It.
It Wasn’t Long Afterward The Proverbial Rug Was Ripped From Under Me.
He Broke-Off The Engagement…
…And Then The Relationship.
I Wanted To Cry.
I Wanted To Show How Much It Hurt.
But, I Didn’t.
I Just Sucked-It-Up.
I Carried-On.
I Will Say This…
…If I Ever Need To Escape A Relationship…
…All I Really Need To Do Is Ask The Person To Marry Me.
In Fact, I’d Likely Be Single Again Before The End Of The Day.
Is It Me?
Am I The Reason They Duck-Out?
Or, Is It Something Else?
Perhaps It’s Thoughts Of The Future?
Our Future?
Could YOU Handle Marrying Someone You Already Knew Had Mental Difficulties???
That Could Turn-Out To Be The Question Of The Day.
Could YOU Handle It, My Peeps?
Could YOU See Yourself Loving Someone Like That?
Someone Who Spends Most Of His Time In A Dark, Sullen Mood?
Someone Who Always Sees The Negative BEFORE He Sees Anything Positive?
Could You?
Could You Handle It?
It’s A Valid Question, My Peeps.
It’s One Where I’m Very, VERY Curious About The Answer.
"You Jivin' Me, Turkey?" 