“A (Closing) Scene Of Horror” by BRADLEY ALAN (c) 2003 & 2013

A (Closing) Scene Of Horror

by BRADLEY ALAN

(c) 2003 & 2013

Philip and Albert (Phil and Al)…

…are trapped together in a building of some sort. Perhaps a Barn or an Older Storage Room/Locker.

Something like that.

Philip is mainly uninjured, but appears to be pinned into a corner…

…Somehow.

…OR…

…Maybe he just doesn’t want to come out of it. Hmm. Nobody truly knows but he, himself.

Albert has a large object crushing his right-leg just above the knee.

Farm Equipment?

Industrial-Sized AirConditioner?

Something large, heavy, and appropriate to the setting that also could have fallen from above and landed on this dude.

They Talk Together.

Simply.

Quietly.

Philip is doing his best to keep Albert as calm as possible.

Albert thinks he’s going to die, and Philip is pretty damn sure Albert is going to die.

There’s no way for Philip to move whatever it is that’s crushing Albert’s leg.

Period.

So, As I said, Philip is trying to keep Albert calm.

They’ve been trapped wherever they are for a couple hours, now.

They’re tired.

Exhausted, really.

They’ve lasted the longest.

They’re the ones still standing at the end (except for Albert whom will do no more standing).

They’re waiting.

Waiting to die.

But, they’re still fighting the good fight.

They’re still alive.

They’ve come this far.

They Talk Together.

Simply.

Quietly.

=== === === === === === ===

PHIL:  “Wish I Knew The Time.”

AL:  “You… You Keep Saying That.”

PHIL:  “Because I Still Want To Know, Dude.”

AL:  “Oh. Ri… Right.”

PHIL:  “Hey, Question?”

AL:  “Oh… Okay. What?”

PHIL:  “Do You Ever Watch Movies That Have The Larger Than Life Characters…”

AL:  “Yeah… Sure.”

PHIL:  “I Wasn’t Done.”

AL:  “Fuckin’ Sorry, Alright… …Continue…?”

PHIL:  “So You Watch The Movies, And You See This Guy.”

AL:  “Yeah?”

PHIL:  “Goddammit, Let Me Finish, Please?!”

AL:  “Fuckin’ Sorry!”

PHIL:  “So You See Him, And You Wonder What It Felt Like To Be Him, Ya Know?!”

AL:  “What Kind Of Guy Are We Talking About?! Batman’ish, Or Something?!”

PHIL:  “No, No. Like, The Godfather, Or Rocky, Or Like, Spartacus, Or General Patton?”

AL:  “Patton, Eh?”

PHIL:  “Sure. He Was Pretty Awesome. If We Were Going To Live Through This, I’d Watch It With You. Or, You Could Watch It With Me. My Treat.”

AL:  “Why The Fuck Not. That’s Cool, Dude. I’m Grateful.”

PHIL:  “Sooo… Would You Want To Be General Patton, Or Fuckin’ Not?!”

AL:  “Why The Fuck Not.”

PHIL:  “Whatever Floats Your Boat, Right?”

AL:  “Do You Think I’d Be A Good General?”

PHIL:  “What?! Now!?!”

AL:  “Sure?”

PHIL:  “Do They Allow One-Legged Generals?”

AL:  “I Could Get A Peg, Couldn’t I?!”

PHIL:  “You Were In The Navy, Not Me, Dude.”

AL:  “Those Are Admirals, Man. Not… Not Generals. I Know Admirals Can Get Pegs.”

PHIL:  “What?!”

AL:  “Wish I Could Shift. My Ass Has Been Asleep For… For… Sheesh.”

PHIL:  “Wish I Knew The Time.”

=== === === === === === ===

After PHIL Utters The Phrase The Final Time, I Envisioned A Pulling Back Shot Of The Two Of Them As The Screen Fades To WHITE.

Just As It’s Ending, We Hear A Loud Crashing Noise.

We Then Hear Both Men Scream A Bit.

Then We Hear Some Struggling And Moaning.

And Finally, We Hear The Screaming Replaced By Gurgling Noises.

And Then It Ends.

We Do Not See Their Demise, But We’re Sure They Met It.

At Least, We THINK We’re Sure. 😉

I Think That Will Do Just Fine. 😀

Just Remember…

…This Is A “BMovie” We’re Talking About.

A Sort-Of Parody Of The Horror Genera.

Something Worthy Of The SYFY Channel.

Ya Feel Me?!

Do Y’all Get My Jive?!

GREAT!!

I Just KNEW You WOULD!!!

So... Are YOU Jivin Me -questionmark-

😀       😀       😀

“A SCENE Of HORROR” by Bradley Alan (Rated “R”)

Alright, My Peeps.

This Is A Tinkered-With Version Of Something I’d Written About A Decade Ago.

In 2003, Actually.

The Tinkering Part Is An Expansion Of The Setting Of The Scene.

The Actual Parts Of The People In The Scene Haven’t Been Much Tinkered-With At All.

I’ll Warn You Now…

…My Dream Of Writing, Especially When Thinking About Potential Movie Scenes, Or Screenplays, Etc, Has NEVER Been Geared Toward The Goal Of One-Day Winning An Academy Award.

Actually…

…I Never Considered Winning Any Awards For It.

I Wanted To Write “B-MOVIES“…

…Ya Know…

…More Like A “SYFY CHANNEL ORIGINAL” Type Of Film.

I’m Not So Good When It Comes To Dramatic Writing…

…Nor Really Comedy Writing, Either.

BUT…

…Boy, Oh Boy, Can I Write Some Quality CHEESE!

This Piece…

A SCENE Of HORROR

by Bradley Alan

…Is Exactly That.

It Was Written To, Hopefully, One Day Be Expanded To The Point Of Having An Entire Screenplay.

A CHEESE LADEN SCREENPLAY!

😀

It Really Is…

…(RATEDR“)…

…So If You’re Easily Offended By Harsh Language, I Doubt You’ll Like It So Much.

Fair Warning.

😉

Alright…

…Here We Go, Kiddies.

*** *** *** *** *** *** ***

*** *** *** ***

***

I’ve Left The Setting Rather Ambiguous, As I’m Sure This Scene Could Be Used In A Couple Different Types Of Horror Flick.

Most Notably, I Think It Could Be Used For Something Like A Zombie Apocalypse Type Flick, Or Simply A Flick Where There’s A Small Group Of Folks On The Run From Someone, Or Something.

That’s Actually The Least Important Part Of What I’m Presenting Here, As I Was More Concerned About The Characters, And What They’ve Got Going On.

Whatever, Or Whom Ever, They’re Running From Is Obviously Bad Enough That The Small Group Of Folks Is Very Noticeably Shaken To The Point Of Hysteria.

The Scene Is Of A Small Group Of About 5 Or 6 People, Though Only Three People Are Participating In The Speaking Portions Of The Scene.

And Now To Begin

It’s The Dead Of Night.

(((Pun Totally Intended, By The Way.)))

GIRL #1:

(Sobbing, Hysterical)

We’re Going To Die! We’re ALL Going To Die, I Just Know It!

GUY #1:

(Almost Frantic, But Calmer Than The Rest Of Them)

LOOK, Just Shut The Fuck Up And Let Me THINK!

GIRL #1:

(Sobbing Harder Than Before, Much More Hysterical)

“But We’re Going To Die! They’re Going To Find Us! We’re Going To Die! I Know We Are!”

GUY #1:

(More Forceful Than Before)

Look You Crazy Bitch, I’ve Seen Enough Scary Movies To Know Your Hysterical Ass is No Good To Us Right Now! If You Don’t Shut The Fuck Up NOW, I’ll Kill You Myself Just To Save Everyone Else!

GIRL #1:

(Still Pretty Hysterical, But The Sobbing Has Suddenly Stopped)

HEY, Who The Hell Do You Think You Are! You…

GUY #1:

(Gets Up In GIRL #1's Face, He's Much More Forceful This Time)

ONE MORE FUCKIN’ WORD! JUST ONE FUCKIN’ MORE, AND I’LL DECK YOU! JUST ONE FUCKIN’ MORE!

GUY #2:

(Frantically Comes-Over To The Aide Of GIRL #1)

HEY! YOU CAN’T TALK TO HER THAT WAY! Y…

--(GUY #1 Totally Decks GUY #2 With A Savage Uppercut To The Chin)--
--(GUY #2 Falls Hard To The Ground, Totally Laid Out)--
--(GUY #1 Turns Toward GIRL #1)--

GUY #1:

(As Forcefully As Possible)

AND THAT GOES FOR YOU AND EVERYONE ELSE! I AM NOT GOING TO DIE OUT HERE BECAUSE Of YOU! YOU WANNA BITCH, SCREAM, OR ANY OTHER FUCKIN’ THING, FINE! BUT NOT WITHIN A HUNDRED FUCKIN’ MILES OF ME! GOT IT!?!?!

--((DEAD SILENCE))--

GUY #1:

(Still Forceful, But Noticeably Calmer)

Good! Now, Let’s Keep Moving!

GIRL #1:

(A Bit More Whiny Than Frantic, And Holding Back Tears)

And THEN WHAT!?

--(GUY #1 Begins Helping Up GUY #2)--

GUY #1:

(The Calmest He's Been Thus Far)

Try To Survive The Night.

… …

SCENE

.

😀     😀     😀

🙂     🙂

Like I Said, My Peeps…

…I Wanna Write A “B-Movie“…

…And That’s Exactly How This Was Thought-Out.

Not As Something To Be In Some Fancy-Ass Studio Drama….

…But As Something To Be On The “SYFY CHANNEL” On A Saturday Night!

A CHEESE-TASTIC CHEESE-FEST!!!

It Was Fun…

…Right?!?

?!?

Riiight?!?

?!?!?

(Not So) Random (Blu-ray) Movie Mention: “ABRAHAM LINCOLN: VAMPIRE HUNTER” (2012)

Alright…

…So I Did Get ’round To Watching (On The Blu-ray)

ABRAHAM LINCOLN: VAMPIRE HUNTER

…And…

…Well…

…What Can I Say?!

Hmm.

Well…

…Honestly…

I Had Fun.

Perhaps Even MORE Fun Than I Rightly Should Have.

Was It A Good Film?

Nah.

Not Really.

Was It A Sufficiently Sufficient “B-Movie”/Action/Horror/Schlock Flick?

Yeah.

Actually, It Was.

🙂

Is It Gonna Win An “Oscar”?

Nah.

Not At All.

Is It Gonna Get A Couple “Razzie” Noms?

Yeah.

Actually, It (likely) Will.

🙂

Do I Appear To Give A Rat’s Ass Either Way?

Nah.

Not Really.

Does That In Any Way Take Away From The Cheesy Pleasure I Received From Checking-It-Out?

NOT. AT. ALL.

Period.

😀

It Is Was It Is…

…It Is What It Was…

…It Is What It’ll Always Be…

Cheese-Tastic.

Is That EXACTLY What I Expected It To Be?

Yep.

TOTALLY!

😀

What?!

Oh, Like You Really Had High Hopes!!

You KNOW You Didn’t.

You KNEW What It Was Going To Be.

And It Was EXACTLY That.

Cheese-Tastic.

Period.

I’ve Seen Worse Flicks, Fo SHO, My Peeps.

I Loved RUFUS SEWELL As The Big Baddie Vamp “Adam”

…So That’s Nifty.

Mr. SEWELL Has Always Been A Personal Fave Of Mine.

A Very VERY Underrated Actor, To Say The Least.

He Helps The Flick Succeed Much More-So Than It Would Have Otherwise.

Or So I Believe.

THE BOTTOM LINE:

ABRAHAM LINCOLN: VAMPIRE HUNTER

…Is…

…Was…

…Always Will Be…

…BETTER…

…Than A Poke-In-The-Eye…

…With A Sharp-Stick…

…In A K-Mart Parking-Lot.

That’s Good Enough, Right?!

Riiight.

Good Enough, Indeed.

😉       😀       🙂

My Reaction?: “BATTLESHIP” (2012): Not As Bad As You’ve Been Told. Trust Me.

Alright, My Peeps.

What Can I Say To Make This All Totally Understood?

Likely…

…Words Should Easily Do The Trick.

So That’s What I’m Hoping For Here.

Ready?!

GREAT!!!

*** *** *** *** *** *** ***

Tonight…

…I Watched The Major Motion Picture…

BATTLESHIP

…And…

…I Swear…

…I’m Giving You The Straight-Up Of It…

…It Was…

FUN.

.PERIOD.

That’s It.

It Really Really REALLY Was FUN.

Now…

…I Know What You’re Thinking…

…And NO…

…You’re Absolutely INCORRECT.

I’m Not Thinking That.

I’m Thinking…

…Honestly…

…People Have Forgotten The MOST IMPORTANT THING In Regard To Watching A Flick.

You Go Into EACH And EVERY ONE Like It’s The FIRST FLICK YOU’VE EVER SEEN.

Some People Can’t Do This.

"Oh, They Stole This From That Movie."
"Ah, I Swear I've Seen This Before, But Better."
"Yaddi Yaddi Yadda, Plugh!"

Uh Huh.

That’s What Those People Say.

I Say…

"Oh, I Liked That."
"Oh, This Is Cheesy."
"Ah, How Cool Was That."
"Ya Know, I Never Would Have Thought To Use That In That Way."

Can You See The Diff?

Can You??

I Don’t Compare And Contrast.

I Hate That Shit.

I Look At This Thing, And I Say…

"I Wonder What This Will Be Like?!"

I Don’t Say…

"I Hear It Sucks."

…Or…

"This Will Be The Greatest Thing Ever!"

…Or…

"This Is Going To Blow, I Just Know It."

I Say…

"Hmm. I Wonder What Kind Of Imagination These Peeps Have? I'm CURIOUS!"

Notice That?

At All?

I’m Not Here To Say…

BATTLESHIP

…Was The Worst Thing EVER!

Nor Am I Here To Say…

BATTLESHIP

…Was The Best Thing EVER!

Nope.

I’m Here To Say…

“I Watched It…

…I Had FUN

…I Totally Appreciate The Imagination That Went Into It.”

Was There Borrowing From Other Flicks?

Sure.

Was Some Of It Crap?

Yeah, Some.

Did I Care?

Nope.

WHY?

Because…

I. HAD. FUN.

I DIDN’T Care That Some Parts Were ULTRA Cheesy.

I DID Enjoy That Most Of It Was CHEESE-TASTIC!!!!

BATTLESHIP

…Is A “B-MOVIE“…

…Something I Hope Y’all Have Heard Of.

And Guess What?

So Far As “B-MOVIE’s” Go…

…It Was FUN!!!

FUN FUN FUN!!!

So For Those Of You Who Saw It For WHAT IT IS…

…You’re VERY LIKELY To Agree With Me.

Remember…

Watch EVERY FLICK As If It’s THE FIRST FLICK.

You’ve Never Seen Another.

This Is That FIRST TIME You’ve Seen Anything Like It.

NOW…

What Do You Think Of It?!?

Did It Hold Your Interest?

Did The Special-Effects Wow Your Ass Off?

Did You Have FUN?

??? ??? ??? ??? ??? ??? ???

Well…

…I Did.

And I’m The One Writing This.

So I Win.

😛

.Period.

Oh…

…And, Uh…

…By The Way…

…I Loved Seeing My Man…

LIAM NEESON

…Ham-It-Up-To-PERFECTION As THE ADMIRAL!

WHY?

Because He’s…

LIAM NEESON

…Dammit.

That Should Be Enough Of A Reason Right There.

The Man WAS In…

KRULL

…Ya Know?!

In MY WORLD…

…The Man Does NO WRONG.

.PERIOD PERIOD.

😀

Love Ya, My Peeps.

I Swear.

Like…

…For Realz…

…Ya Know?!

GREAT!!!

So…

…Because I Love Ya…

…I’m Showing You A Photo I Took…

…Of…

…The Very Very VERY REAL…

U.S.S. MISSOURI

Original Photo Of The U.S.S. MISSOURI Taken By BRADLEY ALAN :D

Original Photo Of The U.S.S. MISSOURI Taken By BRADLEY ALAN 😀

!!! !!! !!!

Yes…

THE BATTLESHIP

U.S.S. MISSOURI

!!! !!! !!!

Now Are You Happy?!

You’d Better Be.

😉   😀   🙂

What’s On Now?! “RENT-A-COP” (1987)

Well, My Peeps…

…How Are We?

Everyone Doin’ As Swell As Possible?

Not Quite?

Maybe?

Hmm.

WELL..

…The Clock Says It’s 6AM…

…Though I Didn’t Go To Bed Until 3AM…

…And Was Wide Awake By Just After 5AM.

😐

So…

…How Am I Coping With It?

Well…

…I’ll Tell You…

…I Decided To Breakout Another Flick That Could Easily Be Dubbed…

"CRAP-TASTIC"

!!! !!!! !!!

Which Flick?!

Why Lookie Here…

…It Just Happens To Be…

BURT REYNOLDS

&

LIZA MINNELLI

…In…

RENT-A-COP

(1987)

Now Don’t Fret My Peeps.

I Don’t Plan To Delve Tooo Deeply Into This One.

HOWEVER…

…I Will Say…

…O.M.G…

…Get FREAKY With The Cheese-Whiz!!!

😀

RENT-A-COP

…Is NOT The Major League Clunker It Has Been Portrayed As.

However…

…It Is NOT The Best Starring Vehicle For…

BURT & LIZA

…And I Freely Admit That.

RENT-A-COP

…Is A B-Movie.

It’s An ACTION DRAMEDY, And Nothing More.

BURT

…Is His Usual Charming Self.

LIZA

…Is Simply Earning A Paycheck.

And The Film Itself Is Simply Fun To Watch…

…IF…

…And That’s A BIG IF…

…IF You’re A Die-Hard Fan Of Either Star.

Now Comes The Admission Portion Of This Bloggin’ing.

Is…

RENT-A-COP

…A Good Movie?

Eh.

Is…

RENT-A-COP

…A Terrible Movie?

Eh, Again.

Is…

RENT-A-COP

…A Perfectly Crap-Tastic Flick That Will Always Make Me Smile?

YEP.

Does This Copy Belong To Me?

Does It Belong In My Collection?

Am I Willing To Watch It Yet Again?

YEP. YEP. YEP.

!!! !!!! !!!

So What’Ya Think, My Peeps?

Ready To Give…

RENT-A-COP

…A Go?

I Do Promise It Is NOT The Worst Film Ever Made.

It’s Really Just A Not Very Good Movie That I Sincerely LOVE.

Some Of You Know Of My Love/Lust For All Things…

BURT REYNOLDS

…And Some Of You Think I’m Flippin’ Crazy For Being As Such.

But When Has Public Opinion Ever Swayed ME?!?

EXACTLY, My Peeps.

It Hasn’t.

It Doesn’t.

It Never Has.

It Never Will.

I Dance To The Beat Of My Own Drum…

…Only There’s Like 412 Drums Playing All At Once…

…And I’m Being Pulled In As Many Directions.

Oh Well, Right?!?

RIGHT!!!

😉

😀

What’s My GUILTIEST Guilty Movie Pleasure?!?!?

FLASH GORDON

(1980)

😀

😀

Based On The Classic Comic Strip By…

ALEX RAYMOND

…And Directed By…

MIKE HODGES

FLASH GORDON

…Stars…

SAM J. JONES

TIMOTHY DALTON

BRIAN BLESSED

TOPOL

MELODY ANDERSON

…And…

MAX VON SYDOW

!!! !!!! !!!

*** **** ***

The Basic Plot Outline Is Best Described As Such, Via IMDB:

In this update of the 1930s comic strip, Flash Gordon is a football hero who is skyjacked aboard Dr. Hans Zarkov’s rocketship along with beautiful Dale Arden. The threesome are drawn into the influence of the planet Mongo, controlled by Ming the Merciless. Ming has been testing the Earth with unnatural disasters, and deeming it a threat to his rule, he plans to destroy it. He also intends to take Dale as his concubine. Flash must avoid the amorous attentions of Ming’s daughter and unite the warring kingdoms of Mongo to rescue Dale and save our world.

(http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0080745/plotsummary)

*** **** ***

Now…

…I Don’t Know About The Rest Of Y’all…

…But I’ve Always Found…

FLASH GORDON

…To Be An Absolute BLAST!

It’s A “B-MOVIE” On A VERY Grand Scale!

Released In 1980…

FLASH GORDON

…Has Become A TRUE Cult-Classic.

I Can Name A Handful Of Folks Who Truly Do Love This Flick…

…Though…

…I Admit…

…I Can Name A Helluva Lot More Folks Who Truly Despise It.

But Hey…

…What’Ya’Gonna’Do…

…Ya Know?!?

😉

If There’s Anything I Can Say About It…

…It’s That I’ve Never Shied Away From Professing My Love For It.

FLASH GORDON

…Was…

…Is…

…Always Will Be…

…A Personal FAVE-FAVE Of ALL-TIME…

…And There’s Simply No Getting Around That.

I Grew-Up Watching It.

My First Copy Was One I’d Taped Off Of TV…

…And I Wore That Bastard Out!

But…

…I’ve Had A Copy…

…In One Form Or Another…

…Throughout The Bulk Of My Life.

😀

While I’m Not Sure If It’s The Cheesiest Flick Of All-Time…

…It’s Certainly In The Top 10!

So…

…It’s Only Par For The Course That I Would Have A Special Bond With It.

(teehehehe)

Agreed?!?

AGREED!!!

😉

As One Friend Of Mine Has Said Many Times To Me…

"It's CRAP-TASTIC, DUDE!"

🙂

Now Who Could Argue With THAT?!?

Exactly My Point.

😉

Oh…

…And Just So You’re ALL Aware…

…The Name Of My Fantasy Baseball Team…

…Yeah…

…It’s…

FLASH GORDON EXPRESS

!!! !!!! !!!

So…

FLASH GORDON

…May Not Be An Academy Award Winner…

…And…

…It May Be One Of The Cheesiest Flicks Of ALL-TIME…

…But…

…It Remains Part Of My Life…

…And It’s (likely) The Guiltiest Pleasure I Harbor.

I. LOVE. FLASH. GORDON.

PERIOD.

And No Amount Of Dissing On The Parts Of Others Has Ever Been Able To Change That.

LOVE IT.

HATE IT.

WHATEVER.

IT’S STILL A FAVORITE!

In Fact…

…I Think I’m Gonna Watch It Again NOW!!!

😀

Hope Y’all Are Enjoying Your Weekend, Thus Far.

You Know Me, My Peeps…

…I’m Pluggin’ Along As Best As I Can.

I Haven’t Been In A Very Good Mood, That’s For Sure.

BUT BUT BUT…

…I Have The Sneaking Suspicion That…

FLASH GORDON

…Is Going To Save MY MOOD While He’s Saving THE EARTH!!!

😀

VAN DAMME Double Shot: “DEATH WARRANT” (1990) and “DOUBLE IMPACT” (1991)

Well…

…Y’all Have My Brother To Thank For This One.

He Was Out Shopping…

…He Found This…

…And He Simply Had To Snag It For Me!

Nothing Like A Double Shot Of…

JEAN-CLAUDE VAN DAMME

…To Get The Morning Started On The Good Foot, Ya Know?!

SURE YOU DO!!

😉

We Begin With…

DEATH WARRANT

(1990)

…Starring…

JEAN-CLAUDE VAN DAMME

…With…

ROBERT GUILLAUME

…And…

PATRICK KILPATRICK

!!! !!!! !!!

In This Flick…

VAN DAMME Plays A Police Detective Who’s Going Undercover To Find Out What’s Up In Regard To A String Of Murders.

The Thing Is…

…He’s Undercover Posing As An Inmate In A Maximum-Security Prison!!!

Sound Like Fun To Y’all?!

GOOD!!

FUN Is The Name Of The Game When We’re Talkin’ ’bout Some Serious…

VAN DAMMEAGE!!!

😀

And Then We Have…

DOUBLE IMPACT

(1991)

…Starring…

JEAN-CLAUDE VAN DAMME

…As…

…Oh Yeah…

…TWIN BROTHERS!

!!! !!!! !!!

That’s Right, My Peeps.

You Get A Double Dose Of VAN DAMME In The Same Flick!

He Plays Twin Brothers ALEX And CHAD Who Were Separated As Infants The Night Their Parents Were Murdered.

Now…

…The Two Are Back Together Again.

They’re Going After Those Whom Murdered Their Parents…

…And They’re Out To Kick Some Serious Arses!!!

😀

Now Who Could Turn That Down?!

EXACTLY!!

Only Movie Snobs Could Do That.

VAN DAMME Isn’t Going To Win An Oscar Anytime Soon…

…But He’s Won Many Awards In The Annals Of Movie CHEESYNESS!

(hehehe Fo SHO!)

😉

Alright, My Peeps…

…I Do Admit That Neither Of These Flicks Is A True Classic.

In Fact…

…Neither Of Them Are Even The Best VAN DAMME Flick.

So What Are They?!

They’re Exactly As I’ve Said, My Peeps.

They’re Pure CHEESY-FUN, That’s What!!

🙂

Would I Recommend Either Of These Flicks To You As A “Must Watch” Type Of Flick?

Nah.

Not Really.

They’re A Regular Pant-Load Of Fun, Yes…

…But They’re Mainly For Those Who Appreciate Quality “B-Movies”, Ya Know?!

I Tend To Consider Any Movie Starring…

JEAN-CLAUDE VAN DAMME

…To Be A “B-Movie”…

…Which Is Why/How I’m Able To Enjoy Them So Much.

I Go Into Each One Not Expecting Very Much.

Just Cool Action/Adventure.

To Me…

…That’s Good Enough.

I’m All About Fun…

…And Cheese…

…And “B-Movies”…

…So Some Quality VAN DAMMEAGE Tends To Satisfy My Wants/Needs Very Well.

Could It Do The Same Thing For YOU?!

T’Is Possible, I Reckon!!

😀