I’ve Had The Navy On The Brain Allllllll Day Long…

…Thinking About How It Went For Me.

Thinking About The Wonderfully Amazing Times…

…And The Horridly Horrid Times.

Thinking About All The Good I Did…

…And All The Wretched Things I Felt I Had To Do, Or Was Ordered To Do.

Sadly, It Has Become Impossible For Me To Separate Those Times.

For The Longest Time I Considered Myself A Media Professional.

I Was A Journalist, And Wanted To Be Nothing Else.

By The Time I Left The Navy (under negative terms) I Felt I Was Nothing More Than An Administer Of Propaganda.

I Was Never Ever Never Never Ever Allowed To Write My Stories The Way I Felt They Should Have Been Written.

I Was Never Ever Never Never Ever Ever Allowed To Tell The Story The Way It Should Have Been Told.

Instead, I Was Forced To Write “Happy-Glad” Bullshit.

I Was Actually Informed At One Point That I Was Not There To Write MY Stories…

…I Was There To Write For The Sake Of Keeping-Up The Morale Of The Sailors Who Would Be Reading “My” Material.

The Military And I Clashed…

…And We Clashed HARD.

I Was Waaaaaaaaaay Too Much Of An Individual…

…And They Wanted Me To Be Nothing More Than A Cog.

If You’re Into STAR TREK…

…The Best Way To Describe It Is “They Wanted To Assimilate Me” And Make Me Part Of “The Collective” While I Was Trying To Simply Be ME.

I Didn’t Understand Then What They Really Wanted From Me.

At Least, Not Like I Understand It Now.

We Clashed Because Individuals Are NOT Team Players.

That Was My Biggest Shortcoming.

I Couldn’t Fit Into The System They Had Set-Up.

I Did TRY To Fit In…

…But Found Myself Constantly Chaffing Against Those Whom I Referred To As My “So-Called-Superiors” Within Said System.

I LOVED The Navy.

It Was All I’d Ever Wanted In Life.

It’s What I Wanted To Do.

It’s Where I Wanted To Be.

So It Was Personally CRUSHING When I Discovered It Wasn’t As Advertised.

I Thought I’d Show-Up…

…I’d Do My Job…

…And I’d Be The Best At What I Did.

I Never Expected To Be “THE EXAMPLE” Of Everything Wrong.

And I Made It Worse On Myself By Continuing To Be ME, And NOT Who They Wanted Me To Be.

I’ve Regretted My Service In The Navy Since My Discharge.

I Don’t Regret Being IN The Navy, No.

I Regret Being ME While IN The Navy.

All I Really Have To Show For My Service Are The Lasting Friendships I’ve Been Able To Cling To.

And Those Friends Can All Easily Say…

“Bradley And The Navy Were A Toxic Combination.”

And I Would Sadly Have To Agree.

Life Really Went Downhill After My Discharge…

…And It Has Taken Me A DECADE To Finally Start Getting Things Worked-Out To A Reasonably Successful Level.

BUT, My Peeps…

…There Isn’t A Single Day That Passes Where I Wouldn’t Almost Kill For A “Do-Over” Of The Whole Thing.

I Know How To Do Better.

I Know How To Be What They Truly Sought.

I’d Know How To Be The Sailor I Was Expected To Be In The First Place.

Sadly, That’s Impossible Now.

It’s Impossible Because I Wouldn’t Go Back.

Not Now.

Not Ever.

Why???

Because I Can’t Trust Myself.

I’m Much More Opinionated Now.

I’m Much More Aggressive.

I’m Much More Individualized.

So…

…Even Though I Totally Understand My Mistakes…

…And Know How To Avoid Them…

…I’m Very VERY Sure I’d Make Them Again.

Only This Time I’d Likely Be Even More ME.

If ME Couldn’t Make It Work Then…

…ME Sure As Shit Couldn’t Make It Work Now.

But That Doesn’t Change My Feelings.

Those Feelings That Say…

“I Didn’t Go-Out Like I Wanted, And I’d Love To Give It Another Go.”

I’m Just Smarter These Days.

I Know My Boundaries AND Limitations.

I Know I Wish I Could Make It All Different.

I Know Making It Different Is An Impossibility.

…<><><>…<><><>…<><><>…

…<><><>…<><><>…

When I Sat Down To Write This…

…I Was Planning On Something Special For The Observance Of Memorial Day.

Instead…

…This Is What Came Out.

I’m Unsure If It’s A Good OR Bad Thing…

…I’m Just VERY Sure It Felt Good To Write It.

I Salute The Men And Women In Uniform.

Not Just For Their Service…

…But For Their Understanding Their Mission.

They’re Managing Something I Never Could…

…Even When I Tried My Best To Do So.

Such Is Life, Eh?!?!?

Such Is Life.

“It Is Not A Field Of A Few Acres Of Ground, But A Cause That We Are Defending…”

“…And Whether We Defeat The Enemy In One Battle, Or By Degrees, The Consequences Will Be The Same.”

—THOMAS PAINE

(1737–1809)

–AUTHOR–

–INVENTOR–

–THINKER–

–PHILOSOPHER–

–REVOLUTIONARY–

–FOUNDING FATHER–

–AMERICAN–

“I Abhor War…”

“…And View It As The Greatest Scourge Of Mankind.”

—THOMAS JEFFERSON

(1743–1826)

–OUR 3RD PRESIDENT Of The UNITED STATES Of AMERICA–

“Three Things Prompt Men To A Regular Discharge Of Their Duty In Time Of Action…”

“…Natural Bravery…

…Hope Of Reward…

…And…

…Fear Of Punishment.”

—GEORGE WASHINGTON

*****<><><><><>*****<><><><><>*****

(1732–1799)

–OUR 1ST PRESIDENT Of The UNITED STATES Of AMERICA–

*****<><><><><>*****<><><><><>*****

I Did A Couple Miles Today…

…And Found Myself Very VERY Lucky.

My Left Leg Gave-Out At About The 3/4 Part Of My Walk…

…BUT My Jammin’ Tunage Carried Me Onward.

Trust Me, My Peeps…

…Walking With One Strong-Leg…

…And One Gimpy-Leg…

…Sure As Shit Ain’t Easy.

BUT BUT BUT…

…I DID Make It!

So I Can Be Content With That, Fo SHO!

The Highlights Of My Walkin’ Tunage (in no particular order) Included…

#1:

“BEAST OF BURDEN“

By ROLLING STONES

#2:

“SHATTERED“

By ROLLING STONES

#3:

“PHONE BOOTH“

By ROBERT CRAY

#4:

“SOUL TO SQUEEZE“

By RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS

#5:

“SMACK MY BITCH UP“

By PRODIGY

#6:

“IT’S A SIN“

By PET SHOP BOYS

#7:

“RIGHT NEXT DOOR (BECAUSE OF ME)”

By ROBERT CRAY

#8:

“1979“

By SMASHING PUMPKINS

…<><><>…<><><>…<><><>…

Really Just Cherry-Picked The Best Songs.

I’ve Never Done A List Of “8” Before.

BUT…

…These Were The Highlights.

So I Figured WHY NOT, Eh?!?!

EXACTLY!!!

I’m So SO Glad We Agree On This One, My Peeps.

The Outcome Wouldn’t Have Changed…

…But At Least We’re All In Pleasant Agreement.

That ALWAYS Makes For A Better Day.

I Sure Hope You’re Having One.

Or…

…At Least Going To Have One.

I Know, I Know…

…The Bulk Of Y’all Are Still Sleeping.

Sunday IS A Day Of Rest…

…So That’s Perfectly Acceptable.

And…

…As You’re All Aware…

…Being Acceptable Is JUST FINE!!!

😉

Enjoy Your Day, My Peeps.

I Shall Endeavor To Do The Same.

😀

“I Wanna Ask You… Do You… Ever Sit And Wonder… It’s So Strange… That We Could Be Together… For So Long… And Never Know… Never Care… What Goes On In The Other One’s Head? …”–BEN FOLDS feat. REGINA SPEKTOR (“You Don’t Know Me” (2008))

“…Things I’ve Felt But I’ve Never Said…

…You Said Things That I Never Said…

…So I’ll Say Something That I Should Have Said…

…Long Ago…”

“…YOU DON’T KNOW ME…

…YOU DON’T KNOW ME AT ALL…

…YOU DON’T KNOW ME…

…YOU DON’T KNOW ME AT ALL. …”

“…You Could Have Just Propped Me Up…

…On The Table Like A Mannequin…

…Or A Cardboard Stand-Up And Paint Me…

…Paint Me Anything…

…Any Face That You Wanted Me…

…To Be…

…Seen With…

…Damned By The Existential Moment Where…

…We Saw The Couple In The Coma…

…And…

…It Was…

…We Were The Cliche…

…But We Carried On Anyway. …”

… … … … … … …

…<><>…<><>…<><>…

I Sincerely LOVE Whippin’-Out A Quality Tune At 5A.M.

It Brings A Sense Of Joy Into My World That Wasn’t There Before.

Joy…

…To Be Honest AND Blunt About It…

…Is PRICELESS.

So Many People Push For It.

So Many People Lust For It.

Crave It.

Desire It.

And Everyone Has Their Own Sense Of It.

Everyone Has That Little Thing That Brings It To The Forefront.

This Morning…

…This Song…

“YOU DON’T KNOW ME“

By

BEN FOLDS

…Is What Brought Me MY Sense Of Joy.

So…

…I’m Curious, My Peeps…

…What Brings YOU Joy???

Is It A Song???

Is It A Movie???

A Poem???

A Book???

WHAT WHAT WHAT Brings The Joy Into Your World???

??? ??? ??? ??? ??? ??? ???

“JUSTICE IS DUE…”

“…EVEN TO AN ENEMY.”

—THOMAS PAINE

(1737–1809)